Are You Ready for Children?

Are You Ready for Children?

Mess Test: Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flowerbed and rub on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

Toy Test: Obtain a 55-gallon box of Lego's. (If Lego's are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream. (This could wake a child at night.)

Grocery Store Test: Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.

Dressing Test: Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay inside.

Feeding Test: Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor.

Night Test: Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8 - 12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 8:00 PM begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00 PM. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00 PM. Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00 AM. Set alarm for 5:00 AM. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.

Physical Test (Women): Obtain a large beanbag chair and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans.

Physical Test (Men): Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.

Final Assignment: Find a couple who already has a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training, and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run riot. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.

Listening to the Spirit

Today, I had to go into work. Almost everyday (except Sunday) I go in to Comforts and help open the store for the day. As I enter the store, I usually grab my name-tag

off the fridge in the back. There's a magnet on the back to hold it on to my apron that I wear through out the day. I'm now, pretty use to the thought of losing this name-tag... as I turn on twenty different Christmas trees (that we've had up since the end of September). The magnet on the back falls off first and then the tag sometimes grabs onto something metal. I find it on metal buckets, metal table legs, picture frames, and even the tree stems. Lately though, I've been frustrated in finding this silly tag! I'll think to myself that it's kind of nice not wondering if someone knows my name. If I make a mistake...I don't have to worry that my name will make it's way back to my boss!:)

Today though, after I lost the name tag for the millionth time...I wondered if maybe I prayed about finding the little trouble maker...I'd have some better chance of finding it faster. Every other time that I have asked for divine help in searching...I seriously walk right to the spot that I have lost the item. It never fails.

There were tons of people shopping today, and I felt I better just say a silent prayer that I'd be guided to the exact spot that I lost my tag-without being noticed or trampled. I re-traced my step, said a prayer in my heart, and waited for the little feeling to take me along. The next thing that happened was I heard a voice say, "Look in your coat pocket". It was cold in the store-so I had left my jacket on...and had kept my zipper up. My first thought was to doubt that the tag could possibly have fallen into the side pocket! So, I hesitated. Then I had another strong feeling to put my hand in the pocket-...so I did this time. My name-tag WAS in my coat pocket!!! I laughed as pulled it out, and then I stared at this crazy piece of metal and plastic. I have no idea how it could of slipped off my apron and fallen into my jacket pocket...but I do know that I was guided by another being to find this tag and wear it again. I have no doubt that my life and actions are my own, and that I can ask for help- if I just have faith. All I have to do is ask first. I may not get the answer that makes sense or hands me exactly what I think I need. But, if there's a sincere question in my life, I can be guided and given direction and help from above. I believe that our Heavenly Father wants to help us. We just need to ask for that help.

My daughter

"Mabs" is my only daughter. She is in Young Womens and loves it. She really loves to babysit. That is what she does all the time! She is in the seventh grade and has great grades! I really love this girl! She made my new banner up above.:) She is crazy girl and loves to laugh. I am going to post some pictures.

These amazing pictures were taken by Liz Marshall.

Awesome!

 This is Morgan, "Mabs" best friend!

 
The End

Turn Your Hearts

On my mom's birthday last month, our Ward Relief Society gave a dinner and introduced us to a wonderful woman, Sister Gracia Jones, who is the descendant of Emma Smith. She brought her pictures and stories of her life. Amazing evening:)


I was asked to decorate a table for eight of the sisters in our ward to sit at. I was so surprised to find a picture of the table on the Ward R.S. blog! Cool-I had used a paper table cloth and all paper/plastic for the settings. I used my mom's family homestead pictures of her growing up in Alaska, since it was her birthday:) She was surprised and happy to have them sing Happy Birthday also! She said the best part was being able to get up from the table and not go wash dishes-*Toss those plates ladies!* (YES!!)

The Light from Within

Here's my new favorite quote:

"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within." -- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Beets and Bananas

Today, I gathered all my strength...and went back to work. My dear friends gave me high-fives and thumbs-up when I stated that my throat was fully healed. I was ready to start hauling Christmas decorations around again!

A funny thing happened during the day-(I thought I'd share with ya') My friend, Lee, was in Wood 'n Lace helping a customer, when I walked through. The customer told Lee, that for a dollar...he would share a sure fire way of losing weight. This diet was given to him by the hospital staff and dietitians up in Salt Lake. He had shared this with lots of people-all for only one dollar! She looked at me and smiled, then she pulled some change out of her pocket and frowned. She told him that sorry she didn't have enough. I pulled thirty-five cents out of my pocket and gave her my change. Even though it wasn't enough...he still wanted to share his secret:)

This is the menu plan he gave us...for breakfast, you can only have four items:

The next part of the menu for lunch...included: a tomato, a carrot, one beet and some kind of protein (only a pack of card size). This is the same for dinner...the meat can only be skinless and no fat. The one treat for the day-ONE tootsie roll to suck on (not chew). If you can't make it without munching on something, you can have plain popcorn. There should be nothing on any of your food. There should be NO sauces, No butters and No gravy. He was guaranteeing weight loss within the first week. Lee and I both agreed that it's only because your basically starving yourself! We've decided that we'd try the menu for one week, and just see how it FEELS to eat so very little. At the very worst, we just feel grumpy from lack of flavor and variety. I know that night times will be the most challenging! *(Especially since it's almost THANKSGIVING!!!) All this talk about food is making me hungry-how about you? I could go for some sushi...

Home Sick in Bed

You know how life gets crazy, and you just want things to slow down a tad sometimes? Well, my daily schedule has changed for just a few hours-and I'm very grateful to my boss for letting me rest and slow down today.

My kids have been sick, and I was able to stay home and get them to the doctors last week. And, now it's my turn. I took myself to see the doctor yesterday and got an antibiotic to get me back on my feet. When I took my prescription in (there's a pharmacy at my work)...my boss offered to bring my kids dinner! She is totally the best boss ever. I seriously was so exhausted, from lack of sleep and chasing kids, that I had just planned to let them eat cereal:) What a huge difference a couple pizzas and bottle of root-beer can make. My kids even cleaned the livingroom before she dropped their food off. They were so happy to have company and to eat (something other than breakfast). Bless her heart-♥

Now, I'm staying in bed, but tackling the long list of things I've been meaning to do lately...before the holidays get here and the year is actually over.

• Change the multi-colored lights on my tree to just white lights
• Find my kids baby books out in the garage (later tonight)
  
• Round up the Christmas decorations from downstairs (with my kids help)
  
• Decide how I'm decorating Elder's room before he gets home (which room will he use?)
• Find a "home" for all the stuff on my dresser and night stand
• and...try and take a nap before my free-day is OVER:) I think...I need one now!
  

Halloween Treat

The flu-bug hit our house...hours after my youngest walked in the door from his trick or treating out in the neighborhood. He dumped his bag of candy on the kitchen table, ate a piece of chocolate and ran to go brush his teeth. We noticed, that through out the night- he couldn't go to sleep ,and just thought he must be wound up from all the activities. But, early in the morning, right before church started...Starwars was turning green!

His siblings announced to us that Iron-man had "lost it". For the next twelve hours, we bathed, scrubbed and disinfected any surface that he had touched and all particles of air that he had inhaled/exhaled*(Lysol gets the job done quite nicely). The sad part of the story, was that our Dad, of the family...had to go back up north to work. I was left to handle the doctor visit and calling work and schools about our absences.

At nine a.m., Monday morning-the older kids were at school, and Starwars and I were calling the doctor for an ASAP appointment. The quickest they could accommodate our visit was eleven a.m.-right before lunch time. So, we watched videos and played computer games all morning:) I let my boss know (via. cell phone texting) all about our plans for the pending doctor appointment...she was ultra-kind to let me hang out with my sick kid (I'm sure she had better plans that let me bring my five yr. old into work and share the contagious love). I returned the favor by updating her with lovely pictures of my adorable sick child.

She was even so understanding in hearing all the details of his swine flu testing. (The nurse puts a HUGE Q-tip up the nostril and swabs the mucous membranes).

*Today is Tuesday, and Starwars and I are still home watching videos and waiting for a call from the doctors office. I'm crossing my fingers the test comes back NEGATIVE...Please! Please! please:)